Wednesday, October 29

Good news

I keep forgetting to share my good news. I've known for over a week, but failed to mention it here. I have new room-mates, yeah! About a year ago, I got this huge house...for, my friend, Lanora, her boyfriend, J.P., her mpd mom, my brother, and me....I said it was big, didn't I. In fact it may well be the biggest place I've ever lived, but anyway...they all moved out, except Lanora. Well, Robert (the tall guy hugging Gallagher - pic right), never moved in, but that's another long story. So, there's been just 2 of us here, for months. But for my one year anniversary in this house - yes, Halloween! - I will have 2 new room-mates. The best news: they're friends, already. I really didn't want to rent to total strangers, but now we're getting 2 people we not only know, but like. It also means we'll have at least 4 computers in our network - I can't wait: oh, the power, the speed....the total system failure, um, maybe we can just skip that last part. So, ontop of a party Friday, I have a house to re-arrange and people to help move into it. And that which does not kill me makes me stronger, I hope.

Then, I guess there must also be some bad news - all's fair in love and war (and ehowa). I feel worn out at those messageboard/forums. I gave up a long time ago on trying to make people like me, I won't try, or lie anymore. Sometimes the truth hurts, and like I imagine could have affected them with my rants, they've retorted more crudely than I ever imagined. It seems I really can't win. It was the utmost witty/crude rhetoric I've experienced in awhile, and here I thought pissing-people-off was a good thing - at ehowa, anyway. As usual, I gave it my all, and that was way too much. One of these days I'll learn, won't I? Anyway, not today, not for awhile ... What a waste of drama!

So, I've got better things to do...And better people to do them with, like Thomas and Vanessa (the new couple of room-mates)...So, hasta luego ehowa, hasta luego...cuando me repongo - mas fuerte...

Tuesday, October 28

um, o.k.

You are Juan Moreno!!

Which Completely Random Person Are You!!
brought to you by Quizilla

Reality check

I thought it was about time to speak again...'cause I like it so much, but seriously because of all my webpage changes. I hope it's not too much, boy if I had a nickel....

My fave new thing is certainly the Gallagher pics, but I'm afraid their download time is adding too much weight. Problems...?, let me know...!

Otherwise, I hope you're enjoying, even though I know you can't possibly keep up with all the links.

So,, still sick, still don't know why, still stuck at home...thank god for Halloween! (can't forget that party Friday)

Monday, October 27

last one...really

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Striding along the terrain, wielding a meaty axe, cometh Brock! And she gives a booming grunt:

"I'm going to hump you for such a long time, Buddha will explode!"

Find out!
Enter username:
Are you a girl, or a guy ?

created by beatings : powered by monkeys

had to you can't guess what i do next

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Stalking over the tarmac, wielding a piece of chainlink fence, cometh Veronica! And she gives a booming roar:

"I'm going to torment you until the laws of physics are violated!!"

Find out!
Enter username:
Are you a girl, or a guy ?

created by beatings : powered by monkeys

is it a quizy kinda night?

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Who is that, stalking through the icy wasteland! It is Toys, hands clutching a thorned whip! And with a vengeful scream, her voice cometh:

"I'm going to blow a bullet-hole in you the size of God!"

Find out!
Enter username:
Are you a girl, or a guy ?

created by beatings : powered by monkeys

what a shock...


Which Seinfeld Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

All the Same One

The ones I know
are all the same
I must know
for whom I search
if he's repeated
seemingly endlessly
in my life to see,
but not save
love, but not keep
but not reap,
the fruits of love

The nights, the same,
an A for effort,
yet always the same
out with the boys
and just a few drinks,
but always more
- too much
more of the same
ole ball 'n' chain
at work for love'll
drive anyone insane

Music played,
bells, chapels, birds,
whatever; it was,
it's over now
I never tried
so hard, or
wished so much,
and begged, even
more, for one more
favor for us

The world,
the spirit,
the mind, his only way
her only dynamism
cats and dogs
alive and gone
above and below
it all can only fit,
always and
in every way,
but in no way at all
at peace,
with joy,
or above alone.

Sunday, October 26

So Short

I want to fuck you
like an animal

no strings attached
pure unadulterated
passion and lust

no love, no caring
in and out
like a terrier in heat

utter ecstasy
will be reached
again and again

pleasure and pain
wrapped together
the next morning

no pain nor hurt
we knew what
we were doing
and now it's over

....Back when I was a mere teen, I loved to write poetry based-on or beginning with a line from a song. That week, my fave was NIN, but I don't think the poem has too much to do with the song.

Saturday, October 25

I Maybe Key

There's a place
so well hidden
so far away,
yet so near

It's a safe place
a serene place,
a place where
I need to go

It holds the key,
the key I need
to find my way
but to get there

I must find a key -
It's not a normal key
rather a special key

This key unlocks more,
more than you
could ever know

There are secrets
there are truths
and there are answers

Answers, truths,
and secrets
that I need
to know
want to know

It's not fair
that I can't go

If I find the key
will I find me,
but I'm right here
I shouldn't need a key

Friday, October 24

Where the wild things really are

They breed in the streets
in the dark air
under the lights so loud
walking along in flowing streets
without a worry or thought
almost as though they're proud
enjoying the scenery
in its brash subliminal truths
lookin for the next event to occur
unknowingly creating the lack of greenery
those superficial barbaric sleuths
that come out at evening to cause a stir

They follow the herd mindlessly and wild
wanting to be loved and accepted
acting rude and without a care
never dare to be mild
never be too perceptive
though they say it's so unfair
strive to be the best
try to fit in with one more Coors
at this after hours bar and the next
truly no better than all the rest
they're my friends and yours
so maybe it's time we all got a little more vexed
be truly wild as we claim
rather than simply being just the same

Wednesday, October 22

Hot Stuff

You are Form 0, Phoenix: The Eternal.

"And The Phoenix's cycle had reached
zenith, so he consumed himself in fire. He
emerged from his own ashes, to be forever

Some examples of the Phoenix Form are Quetzalcoatl
(Aztec), Shiva (Indian), and Ra-Atum
The Phoenix is associated with the concept of life,
the number 0, and the element of fire.
His sign is the eclipsed sun.

As a member of Form 0, you are a determined
individual. You tend to keep your sense of
optomism, even through tough times and have a
positive outlook on most situations. You have
a way of looking at going through life as a
journey that you can constantly learn from.
Phoenixes are the best friends to have because
they cheer people up easily.

Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Tuesday, October 21

Sex Runts

Sex is like a box of runts candy
for women anyway
There are 5 colors
pink, red, green, orange & yellow

The pink is shaped kinda like a heart,
so I guess this is your symbol for love
The real thing, utter ecstasy
there are never enough of the pink
and they taste the best

There are always a few more red ones
these are almost shaped like
a heart, but not quite
These taste pretty good, at first
then they get a little tart
sound familiar?

Then there's green,
well, that's simple enough
These sour balls weren't ready
to be eaten yet
Just pass over these and hold out
for the good ones

Next there's orange,
all bright and colorful
Just like the guy who's so full of
himself you could just puke,
which is the same feeling you get
after biting into one of these

Last, but definitely not least
is yellow, the banana
This one blows all around
it tastes rotten and yet,
sex, like runts,
is choked full of these

Monday, October 20

Why now?

I feel a very strong one
One of passion, but more
More than oh-so-easy fun
Fun all around, and floor

You gave me too much
Much more than I need
Needs will develop as such
Such you'll ask, else I'll plead

I can't get into it
It scares me the most
Most of all everytime you hit
Hit a homer, never boast

You show and prove it can
Can be your best, easy
Easily and completely a man,
Man who choose to tease me

I've never been so treated
Treats from you do so much, well
Well, I love how close and heated
Heat from those bodies in meld

I really don't like the title, any ideas?

Sunday, October 19


It started a few days ago
and it hasn't stopped yet
I'm getting tired, sore
I don't know what to do
I can't make it go away
It's best to just let it go
It seems to know what to do
and how to it - well I think,
or rather I don't think
I write, it flows, it burns
it matters, some, but more
More than I'd ever know
It's the most I've felt
In so very long and wonder
where did it go before
It could have left me
but I didn't mean to ignore it
It deserves all the attention
and cheer and room and time
but I forgot how or why
I choose not to sit with pen
and write with lead and cry
and laugh and understand
I'll never make others,
but I can reach something
by the end of ever passage
I know a new thought -
completely yet questionably
It's o.k., we got what's needed.

Thursday, October 16


What is it now

We make one
a new one
every time

Everytime it doesn't matter
yet we must do it

Again we're here
in the same position

One we tend into
again and again

Again and again
I'm in there

You're in there
yet we can't
we shall not

For some reason
for some ideal

Some silly song
to soothe the senses
calm the uncomfort

Fill the silence -
though so few

We have so few
and make them all

All of them
one and again
intervene and intrude
in life and in love

Come together
into life
but not into love

Infact life was later
as love was later

Each a year, or so
but both in time now
yet no one checks the clock

The time is now
but the moment's ignored

Ignored before, now, but later

Until when
must we
why must
we must and now

It's too long to wait for
not this, not that
these are exactly what

What we need
we need exact language

The language of us
and why not of us

It's for us to find
so find we must
this pretense - and now

Tuesday, October 14

I won; I won...

From the main menu in the Floatilla ... "Thanks to all you Felons and Fiends that entered this month's contest. Congratulations to Veronica Toys Brock (see her fan profile) on winning the Felons & Fiends contest. Click here to see the answers!"

Check it out...I still can't believe it. I got my winning bootlegs this weekend...there is nothing better than acoustic Holmes!

movin on (another kinda old one)

I came by today, but you were out
I just wanted to get some things
I'm not sure where, but oh well
you're not there, guess it'll have to wait
until another day when I come by
just to see if you've found anything
any thing I might've left behind.
I'm not quite sure what, but you'll know
I'm sure as soon as you see it -
It should be pretty big, because
I'm missing something pretty big
I'm just not sure of what it is
I had to have left it with you
You had everything there in that place
I didn't pack it with my clothes
or even with my books or utensils
I just don't know where to look but there
at your place, it's just got be there
In there somewhere among your things
What would you do if you found it
dusty mixed with your dirty clothes
Would you wash it, clean and dry
Just right, and crispy fresh, or not
Not my heart please don't touch it
Leave it alone til I get there, please.

Sunday, October 12

so am I redundant, yet?

morally deficient
Threat rating: Medium. Your total lack of decent
family values makes you dangerous, but we can
count on some right wing nutter blowing you up
if you become too high profile.

What threat to the Bush administration are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

If i was a serial killer i would be Albert Fish.

Albert Fish was a masochistic, pedophile obsessed with religious themes such as sin, sacrifice, and redemption through pain. It is believed that he would force his own children to beat him with a nail studded paddle until he bled. He would also stick nails underneath his finger nails,into his groin, his scrotum and his anus. He forced himself to eat feces and would stick alcohol soaked cotton balls up his anus and set them on fire.

Fish believed that God wanted him to castrate boys, which he would do over the course of many years, finally to be caught for kidnapping, murdering and eating a 10 year old girl. Fish claims to have molested over four hundred children. Police charged him with eight but suspect him on fifteen.

Kill count: unconfirmed

Find what serial killer you would be, Take the Serial Killer Quiz now!

new quiz? Or would that be, the last quiz...

I Will Die of Natural Causes.
Your choice of life style has enabled you to live a nice long life.. To eventually die of a stroke, or was it a heart attack.. Either way you out lived just about anyone that gave a shit about you anyway.. Congrats

Find out how you will die, Take the Death Quiz now!

Saturday, October 11

Ernie's House of Whoop A..

I mean it; I can't get enough of it. It's by far the most animated forum I have ever seen. My friend, Xyon, turned me on to it yesterday. I think I've been back to it almost a dozen times.

It's what sex ed class should have been...It's what presidential debates should be like...And it's what communication was meant for (among other things).

Anyway, you should check it out too. It'd be as good as the Floating Men forum, if only it were free. But it is free to check it out...and, once you get a taste, you'll keep coming back.

If soap opera's had real sex, it might approach the drama within this site. As it stands, I doubt there is anywhere else (legal) that you can have this much fun conversing.

Silly me, I always thought 'forum' was a bad word (politically, that is). Sometimes, it's good to be wrong...and if you're lucky, you just might like it. Give it a try, but don't blame me if it leaves a bad taste in your mouth...

Friday, October 10

O.K., last one today, I sware

Your element is Earth. I hate to say it but you are
down to earth. Stubborn and loyal. You tend to
want to nurture others and you are the one
person friends always come to for awnsers.
Without people like you others would be flying
over the edge because, whether you know it or
not you keep a steady beat to your life and
will end up where you want to in the end. There
is a sureness about you that is hard to match
that draws people to you. No matter what
happens the Earth keeps turning.

What's your element
brought to you by Quizilla

This one feels as likely as Morpheus. I like it, I really, really like it.

I guess now that I'm addicted to it, I should make some of my own...I can see it now...signs, colors, personality, numbers, character...and oh my, maybe later.

enlightening, if you have faith in Quizilla


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

idealism+sleep=good!....those are two things I often think I need more of.

A Muse, me?

Within the system
the temple of me
My story's inside
Inside the mix

I know not where
I know not how
I know not what
Whatever's the thing

The one that bites
and tugs and grabs
I can't grab it
It's here, right here
so close, very close
all-most, but not quite
I'll not quit it

Try it again, and
It will be there
right there, where
It always was
I could not look
I have to look

No matter what
I find, I can do
I deal with it
I'm ready to deal
So shuffle me in

...more recent poetry...yet always, searching, for something...

Thursday, October 9

when they're right, they're right....kinda erie

Your like me! Sorta weird! I know where I wanna be,
but you probably don't wanna be there! Many
places! I'd like to be in Utah, or I'd like to
go To Ireland! Ireland is so fastnating! :o)
I'm Irish, so even more fasinating! ^_^ I hope
this QUIZ didn't bore you to death! See, since
your like me, I'll give you my life story. Okay
I was born and rasied in a small town. Moved to
another small town! That is where I am now!
Then I was only four and now about thirteen. So
I have many crushes! And a few have rejected
me! :o) Then This year I picked up my new
faiort book of ALL time and read it! Now I'm
obsessed with the main charictor! :o) Life can
be soo short! Back to where you should
live.... You should pick your oun stuff! Do it
YOUR way! : ) ^_^ Rock on! :p! Have faith, the
Lord will guid you in the right direction!

Where should YOU live in the world?
brought to you by Quizilla

I was planning on Utah, right after Uruguay. And I am a bit Irish. And I seem fond of moving within circles of small towns. And of course, I always have some kinda faith.

oh, so that's what I'm doing wrong....

STAND UP: You are a natural stand-up comedian. You
watch the news with people, and when you give
your opinions, people start laughing. They are
not laughing at you, they are laughing because
what you say is so TRUE. The world is a very
funny place, full of natural comedy. All you do
is repeat various humorous things that you
notice from everyday life. Your unique
perspective on the world is what makes you so
funny. Of all the various comedy types, you may
be the funniest of them all!


How funny are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

...I shouldn't be sitting down blogging, I should stand up (sayth Quizilla). Who knew?

Quizilla is fun, in a trivial kinda way...

Fun and spunky, you link, there for you are! This
is all fun and games, and you do what you
damned well please!

What kind of blogger am I?
brought to you by Quizilla

Wednesday, October 8

more from Quizilla...

Season = Winter
You're Most Like The Season Winter ...

You're often depicted as the cold, distant season.
But you're incredibly intelligent, mature and
Independant. You have an air of power around
you - and that can sometimes scare people off.
You're complex, and get hurt easily - so you
rarely let people in if you can help it. You
can be somewhat of a loner, but just as easily
you could be the leader of many. You Tend to be
negative, and hard to relate to, but you give
off a relaxed image despite being insecure -
and secretly many people long to be like you,
not knowing how deep the Winter season really

Well done... You're the most inspirational of
seasons :)

?? Which Season Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Poetic passive - aggression

So, What Values Do You Hold Onto?

Is Honesty seen
in the lights
that guide your way
or is it just
a dim light -
flickering in back
of your consciousness.

Perhaps, Friendship, then
It can find you too
on a sunny day playin' in grass
or it can leave you right there
in the same way, a haze of
Hot 'n' bothered and lost -
on your own ass
and definitely all alone, too.

Entertainment is it -
if you use it right
like the humane did
Ages ago we began
and today we still can, and do
weave a story tale
filled with half truths and
silly exaggerations -
ignore the forgotten reality land.

Is Learning how,
that which we want to be,
admirable to dynamically gain and grow,
good to know and think -
right thru mistakes, and
Bathe off wrong, by choosing to be.

How 'bout Respect
Respect your elders
Love Ms. Franklin, and
do unto others as you would them to you,
if not, then expect
at least the worst -
for your clansmen
if not, just your soul alone.

And Faith, sometimes
it disappears, yet
before our very eyes
What if you ever try to find it, now
and it's gone
It was right
where you left it,
but now it's not -
without blind trust how ever do I see you?

Forgiveness is divine
sayth the wise and pious.
One little word
can restore it all -
Dignity, honor, promise, and belief
joy and pain waste away
together without title
in secret lack of communication, and sin.

Patience is a virtue
not too virtuous with you
I have it, or had it
At least I often try to have it
Do I go get it -
so shall I wait and see
What the tendency can deliver unto me

Fears are clutched tightest
when held the closest
Imagination serves only one purpose
intertwining what's real
and what's really not -
concern grows as minds 'n' hands close.

Possessions of the world
or are they yours,
or are they mine,
or are they really anyone's at all.
They will own you
they must have you
they will rule you -
Do you, still, desire such a sucker?

Privacy often is
idle hands, and only
idle minds in a quarter,
of the private chambers of ourselves
wherever we can,
but that can lead
in any way, at all -
or, simply, drive you alone mad.

So, you wanna play Euchre?

Tuesday, October 7

If I post any more, it's gonna need it's own space...

Untitled (another sex poem)

You know what this world needs,
that's right another sex poem

Don't bother faking distaste
enjoy this life like you did last night
I saw your joy, lust, and little bit of pain
Don't ever say I'm too taboo
or simply turn you blue

Enjoy a good romp in the hay
Dont' worry as to whether or not it's o.k.

Jump up and down, pant and groan
make them weak, shiver and moan
Do it right or don't do it at all
It's not love without which you must fall

Go to a bar and have a drink there
take every chance to sit on his or her knee
Do use protection
and don't rape whenever you get an erection
stop closing your eyes
each time you regret opening your thighs
mean and understand what you do
Don't be so subtle, call a spade a spade and a screw a screw

You want whips and chains
Just be sure to see you doctor about
any internal pains
walk up straight shoulders broad and wide
show them all you have to offer, don't bother to hide

So, what's it all mean?

Recent Piece, a Fave

Here's a fun one:

What All We Learned; Why Do I Care

Simple are the little things inside
Things that are inside everywhere
but to you, no where at all
All of the basic simple cores ain't so thick.

Complex is what we all make it
You stay and fight, and die
but do you ponder ever - settle down
or just the ruler complex everywhere?

Sane finds you on a sunny day
Days, months, decades, or so
Your righthandman in the face of chaos
Always ready to battle the sane another day

Crazy is all that is left for you
Left you to die alone again here
Again your head said it was right there
Beyond and regular crazy grasp.

Why forget what we learned
Good and Evil
Happy and Sad
Simple and Complex
Sane and Crazy
We all learned.

Why, I do care! doesn't mean what you first think, I promise. Read it again...before you rant or rave.

Monday, October 6

La Scorpio

So you think you wanna know me? - a Scorpio...Well, here you go:

Strengths: serious, steadfast, sexual
Weaknesses: depressive, worrying, escapist

Here's some advice I should take: Let the sun shine in and the light within you shine out. Don't take things so seriously. Work on leveling out your moods and see how much happiness you can bring to yourself and others. Put your singular insight to productive use. Learn to laugh more at the illusions of the world and also at your self.

likely traits: profundity, depth, kindness (to animals and small kids), giving, intense (if not volcanic), secretive, controlling, not a victim, sexually needy and demanding, sentimental, strongly habitual (behaviors are often lost only to love), fiscally irresponsible, and don't think life is worth living without struggle.

Others like me: Ike Turner, Marie Curie, Roy and Wil Rogers, Hedy Lamarr, Yanni, Sally Field, Bonnie Raitt, and Maria Shriver, and of course, Cro-Mag...among others.

Source: 'The Secret Language of Relationships', Penguin '97

Although I don't want to admit most of this, I guess I must agree.

Friday, October 3

and sometimes you're a tard

Yeah, my comments work! Yeah! - my comments work. Yeah!; my comments work...

They really really work, all the way! So please us 'em! Sorry the previous comment were lost, but sometimes, it's good to be born again.

Yeah, my comments work! Yeah! - my comments work. Yeah!; my comments work. Yeah, my comments work! Yeah! - my comments work. Yeah!; my comments work. Yeah, my comments work! Yeah! - my comments work. Yeah!; my comments work...